Dear Grady,
shit-man, get outta here
and all, knee flounce
kicked up in the rain and
everythin else. My last
fill, the last stop on this
highway, all prettied up
in Jean Nate after wipin
down greasy windowsills,
out from under my nails,
touched up and pink,
but mostly don’t matter.
all rowdy and bendable.
I hold a lot. It’s the ugly
ones I like though since
they don’t remind me of
you none. 048e006>They come on
all strong and talk like
and then nothing048e006> but
048e007>little boy in their eyes
once we’re alone,048e007> and the
whole time thinkin in
those dingy rooms with
the blinds drawn and the
048e008>hum of the ceiling fan
that I watch sometimes
till it blacks me out with
spin,048e008> 048e009>that there is sun on
top of all this and I sure
hope my dead mama ain’t
watchin me right now.048e009>
She’d thrown her hands
up and wrung her hair
with too much care bout
me. 048e010>I held those hands
in the end and tell her
it weren’t her fault.048e010> She
was still speakin then,
but didn’t say nothin just
fixed me in her eye and
then they seamed shut
imagin the next life I
suppose, and she started
moanin and rockin. I
048e011>guess I upset her again,
as I always did and this
way how least she’d come
to be free of me.048e011> And
you’re free of me except
like a whisper hairlash in
your eye you keep pullin
at, I’m still there, figurin
I guess you’ll come back
down this road. I’m
rememberin you lookin
at me nice that time at
Slappy’s and my dress
before it tore. Remember
Grady doncha? I’m here.
048e014>It’s okay. It’s mended
now. Yours, still and all,
Lo-Red048e014>